The secret lives of spies

In case you were wondering what we really do in our spare time- well I can tell you, but it is strictly confidential information.

Secret Agents "Lightning Bolt" and "Blow Up"

You will be sworn to secrecy. Any violations will result in going to the strictest of prisons where they tie you to chairs, don't even allow you to pee, and truly feed you only bread and water. Alternative identities are floating right under my nose, ahem, my knees. In actuality, my son's are two top notch, world traveling American spies known by the monikers of "Lightning Bolt" and "Blow Up" (subtly is not lost on us). They may be seen in the company of their baby sister "Mouse". These names were acquired because of one's abilities to run astoundingly fast and the other known for his marker of carrying bean sized bombs, which he uses "only to blow up the bad guy cities- mom" and his name in no way reflects his temper tendencies. The third may develop an affinity for cultured milk; still pending.

Stick with us and you also could be privy to the nuances of real spy vocabulary, like learning the difference between a password and a code. The former being something you speak to get you into somewhere and the later being something you write to find or unlock something else. Don't worry, our passwords are incredibly easy to crack, you just have to guess the one English word in the whole dictionary they are thinking of... (*Hint, it often rhymes with Bo-bistopher*). And our codes are totally legible and orderly. They often look like a cross between Hieroglyphs and Ugaritic; should you have any difficulty, consult grandpa. Should you ever have a super secret mission, call us, we are experts, about everything.

Private eye(s). (Be weary of what lies behind that door...)

Essential spy gear- used on most missions:  

• notebooks and files
• magnifying glasses
• walkie-talkies
• watches you can speak into (I always wanted one of those!)
• ear pieces that glow and allow you to read in bed
• spy detector gear (that beeps like a dying cat and scares the bejeebas out of their mother every time she walks by)
• multiple disguises- (Kudos to grandma for her development of the removable changeable Scotch tape mustache!!)
  
• a single glove (this one still baffles me, I guess if all else fails perhaps someone will mistake you as a Michael Jackson crony).
• multiple flashlights
• a suitcase
• a jar of peanut butter
• And NEVER, EVER, forget, the parachute!