"Fanx". A lot.

Somebody else had a birthday. (Um, it may have even been in the fall. That's what happens sometimes. Sorry buddy. I wrote about you then, but didn't get to publish it.)

On the day before you turned 5, amidst a great deal of giggles and birthday pancakes, I recounted in my head the day you were born and how I worked with such intensity to get you with your sideways turned head here. The way that you greeted the world with such calmness and keen observation, not even crying.

These days you are not always calm. Things change pretty rapidly for you. But you do take in everything.

All year your art has really developed. Your pictures, like your life,  are filled with great details and voyages and heroes and quests. Your horse teacher is right that someday you may write a very complex book.

Bastilla: The girl elf

Your gratitude for the world around you is always near the surface and just hearing your simple "fanx" always makes me more energized and generous. Also you very astutely have discovered that, "magic isn't real; except when it's in yours heart." So, in you my darling, never forget that it is actually overflowing.

 

Music also is slowly opening itself up to you. You surprised us all when suddenly you love to do your own funky dances, especially to Latin rhythms, and, unlike so many other times, do not even care if anyone is watching you.

Your humor has developed and as you remind us, can be a great coping mechanism for all of us. Sometimes we meow together when you are upset (I have no idea why this works, but it does), or your toothbrush has to talk, or you and I play a complex game where I am you as a grownup and you are me as a little girl. I get to give you permission to be a lot less serious. And through it all, you remain a small man of great mystery.

Before you turned five you had the firsts of learning to ride a horse, singing in front of an audience, the two of us starting Tae Kwon Do together-- that thing you have "waited for your whole life." You also make some pretty mean pancakes.

Lake Ft. Smith

And some pretty silly faces. You are trying to be a good brother, going along with crazy exploits, enduring being dressed, positioned, and frequently bossed. However, you are also starting to take on new roles as director and crafter of stories. And you stand up for yourself. Fiercely. With your toddler sister you are more willing to indulge, occasionally adore, and even collaborate with her.

You are exacting and careful. Few adults notice or care about all of the details that you do. And you also have the artistic gift of thinking non-linearly and in multiple directions, dimensions, and story lines. Your giggles are amazing and I am so thankful for the quiet mornings when we are up before anyone else in the house. And that you still have a Dragon, who grows and that you make nests for. Dragons, are after all, sometimes very delicate. You help me to learn about patience and living with intensity and completeness. How I love you and your daisies that fill my days.

-XOXO Mama

Of cabbages and kings!

This week was the Medieval fair, and indeed,:

"The time has come...

[the family said],

to talk of many things. 

Of shoes--and ships--

and sealing wax--

of cabbages and kings."

[And while the sea is boiling hot,

Oh! -Hear the mermaids sing!]

-Lewis Carroll The Walrus and the Carpenter

Slice a cabbage the most thinly or
"plummet" (a.k.a. pummel) the opponent to win.

After chasing knights down, sometimes one is just speechless,

OR must undertake a quest of their own.

Presenting: Sirs Cristopher and Connor.

Baby "dragons" require great gentleness

That mermaid gave her a shell!

["O Children," said the Parents,]
"You've had a pleasant run!
Shall we be trotting home again?'
But answer came there none--
And this was scarcely odd, because
[They're snoring, every one.]

Yes Mother and the Milk Mischief

"Yes, Mother!" It is a lament, dripping with sarcasm, that is usually uttered by Connor whenever he is annoyed at what I have asked him to do. But I have decided I am also trying to make this my new parenting mantra. I want to be a "yes" mother. Not because I think that my kids should be able to have a carte blanche to do anything they want, but because I feel as parents, and as a society, we spend a heck of a lot of time and energy stiffeling kids' beautiful enthusiasm by attempting to force them to behave "properly"; to not embarass us. Don't make a mess. Don't go too fast. Don't take that chance. Don't eat that. How many times have I told you...

In the photography class I have been taking one of the prompts was to photograph a mess. One day sitting next to the boys, while my out of town relatives were visiting, they started to blow bubbles in their milk. I caught myself about to say "Don't..."this is embarassing" and then I stopped. I looked at those sparkles and shimmers. How beautifully they stuck and stacked together. I thought about how enticing and fun that was to do as a child- even when we got caught.

I didn't really care what the others thought. In fact, perhaps I changed my mind, just because of what they might have thought. Because of the many things I never got to do. Because of the many things kids never get to do, mostly for inane reasons having merely to do with inconveniencing grown-ups. As so wisely stated in The Little Prince by Antoine Saint Exupery, Les grandes personnes ne comprennent jamais rien toutes seules, et c'est fatigant, pour les enfants, de toujours et toujours leur donner des explications. (Grown-ups never understand anything by themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explaining things to them.) So tiresome.

But this was a mess. A mess in the making. A beautiful mess. A silly-fun-giggle-till you fall over-kind of mess. A memory making kind of mess. So instead I grabbed my camera and I said, "Do it again". They delightfully obliged. These are now two of my favorite photographs of all time.

 

One of my favorite graduate education professors, Dr. Kathryn Castle, once said, "you know a child is most able to learn and having fun when they are so intent on doing something that doing that thing becomes more important then the risk of getting caught". Indeed. 

So here are some things I'm trying to more consciously say yes to:
-To slowing down
-To going fast
-To doing it again and again and again
-To experiments
-To inventions
-To recipes
-To messes
-To mistakes
-To being loud
-To acting our age
-To making a scene
-To being seen
-To seeing
-To being heard
-To hearing

Greetings from planet Kutcha Kutcha!

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A number of months back, Cris told me that at night he never sleeps but that some aliens from planet Kutcha Kutcha come and get him every night and he goes with them. Oh yeah, and we are not actually his real parents. The aliens have brought him here to put him in our care. So in honor of his *SIX* year old birthday (and thanks to a great Groupon!) he got this book- from Planet Kutcha Kutcha, of course!

The secret lives of spies

In case you were wondering what we really do in our spare time- well I can tell you, but it is strictly confidential information.

Secret Agents "Lightning Bolt" and "Blow Up"

You will be sworn to secrecy. Any violations will result in going to the strictest of prisons where they tie you to chairs, don't even allow you to pee, and truly feed you only bread and water. Alternative identities are floating right under my nose, ahem, my knees. In actuality, my son's are two top notch, world traveling American spies known by the monikers of "Lightning Bolt" and "Blow Up" (subtly is not lost on us). They may be seen in the company of their baby sister "Mouse". These names were acquired because of one's abilities to run astoundingly fast and the other known for his marker of carrying bean sized bombs, which he uses "only to blow up the bad guy cities- mom" and his name in no way reflects his temper tendencies. The third may develop an affinity for cultured milk; still pending.

Stick with us and you also could be privy to the nuances of real spy vocabulary, like learning the difference between a password and a code. The former being something you speak to get you into somewhere and the later being something you write to find or unlock something else. Don't worry, our passwords are incredibly easy to crack, you just have to guess the one English word in the whole dictionary they are thinking of... (*Hint, it often rhymes with Bo-bistopher*). And our codes are totally legible and orderly. They often look like a cross between Hieroglyphs and Ugaritic; should you have any difficulty, consult grandpa. Should you ever have a super secret mission, call us, we are experts, about everything.

Private eye(s). (Be weary of what lies behind that door...)

Essential spy gear- used on most missions:  

• notebooks and files
• magnifying glasses
• walkie-talkies
• watches you can speak into (I always wanted one of those!)
• ear pieces that glow and allow you to read in bed
• spy detector gear (that beeps like a dying cat and scares the bejeebas out of their mother every time she walks by)
• multiple disguises- (Kudos to grandma for her development of the removable changeable Scotch tape mustache!!)
  
• a single glove (this one still baffles me, I guess if all else fails perhaps someone will mistake you as a Michael Jackson crony).
• multiple flashlights
• a suitcase
• a jar of peanut butter
• And NEVER, EVER, forget, the parachute!

So this is what happens when you have brothers...

You get to be a Zombie. You have to eat brains. You are given the opportunity of being re-homed. You also live on a racetrack. You have tire marks on your head. Frequently you have to duck to avoid flying arrows and other projectiles of war. The world is loud. The world is fast.

On the other hand, you have ninja powers. You will enjoy mud pies. Our home now revolves around you. You live in a castle and wear many crowns. You will have knights who will fiercely protect you. Already you are rolling over to keep up with the action. This world is boisterous. It has momentum.

You might get to be the elf princess, but you will also be a dragon slayer.

You are adored. Every toot is esteemed. We compose anthems in your name- like Joshua you fight battles (of Calico). You know the songs. You know the music. You're a rock star.

You will NEVER be bored.

Your world will be boundless. We will teach you to be strong. To fly.

And when things get too big you can always crawl back in our cave and be our little mouse. We will have tea together. Oh and by the way, we'll bring the meat.